I love you.

I made this promise to give my God what He deserves. Saying I’ve been falling short is an understatement. It makes me so sad to think about how I care for my God. He gives me hope, comfort, love, discernment, fatherly discipline, and instead I lift my nose high and keep walking. He is my everything. My love. The reason I walk, live, and breathe. This sadness of neglect is heavy for me. He is God. I understand that He could very well continue to do the amazing things He does and move on from me, disown me, and help the ones who are absolutely in love with Him. It’s as if I was there that day. The day He walked up that hill and suffered nailed to the cross. With every faint breath He tells me how much He loves me. So what do I say in return?

I say I love Him.

Is that enough?

Is it true?

Of course I love you Jesus. But when I say these words…

Is my heart beating rapidly?

Am I on my knees because I can’t stand?

Can I finish saying the words without uncontrollably letting go?

Father, you deserve so much more, yet you have never left me.

You’re all I need to be complete.

Your love.

A song.

This morning I woke up and walked to the piano.

I really know this song can be something that shows and moves people to see a glimpse of His saving grace.

This is the longest song I’ve worked on, and the ironic thing is there are already lyrics!

I can’t wait to see where God will take this song.

And I can’t wait to give it to you:)

Salsa.

Something happens to your stomach and breath after 2 days straight of pure salsa.

Thanksgiving

Each year….you never know with my family.

I usually pick 1 person to keep sanity with…never leaving their side.

This thanksgiving was verrrrry interesting.

If I go into detail of the things some people did and said, you would probably have a flashback of a bad dream.

All of that to say, I decided to cling to my 7 year old cousin and sister in law Jenny:)

We basically stayed in the backyard and sang to music the whole time. He’s a little rockstar:)

Talent.

Last night at the coffeehouse show Sami asked if she could draw me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I watched her….and it was INSANE.

Her talent is amazing.

I love her:)

Joy.

I feel your tug of comfort.

Something I would be lost without.

I look forward to turning away from this deceit and running back into your arms.

This time it’s different.

I praise. I smile. I know.

You lift me up not by comfort, but joy.

You gave me hope.

I just knew. He’s out there. Waiting.

Waiting to meet me.

But you tell me, until then…

Keep playing that piano for me.

Keep loving on the lost.

Keep waking up joyful for what I have to offer you.

And when that day comes…you’ll know.

You will have no doubts because I’ll scream it in your ear, “He’s the one”

I’ll be joyful and thankful you finally brought him into my life.

It will be new and awkward, but I’ll love every second of it.

I’ll look back on the ones you took away and smile knowing you are my Protector.

You have been from the beginning.

I pray for him. I pray you keep him busy and at work in your hands.

Even when we are…

Let us serve OUR God.

Let us hold nothing back.

Let us praise the ONe who planned this so creatively.

Let us give this all back to you .

People will know this is a love different than any kind of love.

A love that cannot be known or seen to this world except through you.

I can’t wait to meet him.

He’s worth the wait. So thank you.

Keep me waiting:)

Shortly after writing this…I open up in Psalm and this is the verse that caught my eye…

Let them shout for joy, because You defend them.

Let those also who love your name be joyful in you.

For you, O Lord, will bless the righteous.

With favor You will surround him as with a shield.

Psalm 5: 11-12

Where The Wilds Things Are

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Who wouldn’t love this english class? Analyzing this book…..is just fun:)

I’ve always said…

My dog reminds me of Atreyu from The Never Ending Story. It freaks me out.

 

 

It’s simple.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It might not seem like much.

I parked my car in the usual parking structure.

My nerves getting the best of me before my math final.

I’m frantically shuffling through my papers cramming anything my poor brain could handle.

I took a deep breath.

It was one of those deep breaths that forced me to look away from my papers.

After looking away, I see this.

After spending the day fully focused on one thing, my eyes are glued.

All I could do was stare.

The details… How peaceful the leaves on each of the branches moved in the wind.

The clouds being formed by the wind.

It was the perfect distraction I needed to calm my nerves.

It seems so odd to find such beauty through my dirty front window, but I did:)

It was a perfect reminder of that glimpse of His beauty here on earth.

At least for me anyway:)

This class will be the death of me

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have a final in an hour, and all I can think about is my 3 multiple nightmares last night. 1 included this dumb final today. I hate it.

Random thought of the day: What if I married a guy with the initials TS? How cool would that be?